Why do Aliens want to enslave us?

Lies, lies… they are our FRIENDS. They are trying to HELP US! I don’t even believe they are [[THEY]]. They are US. They are manifestations of an emergency response routine lying dormant in the psyche of the human species.

When the species is in danger of extinction, it kicks in, using whatever metaphor is necessary. It’s goal is simple. To correct the situation which is leading toward extinction. As things get worse, it should be interesting to see this feature activate in millions of humans.

– Scott Busby

Dear Think,

Thank you for the excellent perspectives in your recent issues regarding the situation in Serbia. It is not going to get better there until Milosevic and his people are brought to justice, and the Serb people learn how they have been used.

On the 600th anniversary of the war in Kosovo, in the square where hundreds of thousands of Serbs were gathered, President Milosevic said, “We are entering a new war after 600 hundred years. It is not an armed struggle but if necessary we will use arms.”

The Balkan wars were kindled at that moment… Milosevic knows communist methods very well, uniting them with nationalist rhetoric, and had used three techniques in Bosnia. These can be listed as encouraging radicalism in the Serbian people, turning the Serbs into militias, and organizing provocative incidents.

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To radicalize the Serbs, Milosevic has misinformed them. Implying that the Muslim population and the Croats were planning to kill the Serbs, he said that they had to eliminate them first. Then he armed all the Serb peasants and provoked them to attack the Bosnians and Croats.

To top it all, following the incidents created by the Serb militia he asked the Serbian army to go in and thus held the upper hand… In Kosovo, the savage actions we’re all the work of the ‘militia’. The only difference lies in the fact that, when the Serbian army was preparing to go into Kosovo, NATO has interfered. NATO has to eradicate Serbian facism. Only then can peace come to Kosovo, and the Balkans.

– Taha Akyol-Milliyet

Greetings from the USA.

We’re dropping an email to you to say first off that we really like your magazine. It’s just the right blend of humor and information, something few magazines ever achieve. The grunting midget in the one ad was a good one! Secondly, we would like to announce that two of our artists (Dj Bliss and Brian Stillwater) will be visiting Czech in December/January to play at the Millenium Z event on New Year’s Eve.

We’d like to see if it would be possible to somehow get something mentioned in Think, maybe even an interview with them.

They’d also like to make some contacts before coming over, and Think Magazine is definitely an organization that is of interest to them. They will be there at least a week, with other area gigs and radio appearances while they are there. Let us know if this would be possible. At the very least, we’d like to arrange for you to simply meet up with them while they are there.

Thanks a lot. We hope to hear from you soon. Below is a short bio on each dj/producer.

– Brian Stillwater – Inertia Label Collective


Hmm… how to start this letter, nothing really important to say but I need to rant, rave, and generally scream & holler about some things that really piss me off. It’s either that or kill someone.

My housemate and I share a bathroom. Could she be a little considerate? No. Do I have to leave the house at 7:45 to get to work on time? Yes. What is taking so long? She and her boyfriend are in the shower together. Real nice. Way to go. Have all the sex you want, BUT DO YOU HAVE TO DO IT WHEN I NEED TO GET READY FOR WORK!

How about this? Two days ago my housemate storms in to MY ROOM at 6:45 AM and decides she has to listen to BILLY OCEAN. Not even ‘Carribean Queen’, but all the other crap he came up with in the 80s. What’s worse is she went to a modeling agency yesterday who told her to lose AT LEAST 2 kilos.

Why is it that almost every young Czech woman today only dreams of being a model? What the hell kind of self-esteem are they supposed to have when their future “career goal” consists of fitting the stereotype of a model? Maybe 2 girls out of 50,000 even have a shot, and the rest will never make it because they don’t look right.

Why don’t any of the careers that really DO exist and are obtainable have any appeal? No wonder so few Czech women are able to actually feel self-confident.

And to the Harley Davidson accountant-by-day, rebel-by-night biker wannabe who lives on my street; Look, there’s nothing wrong with having a good midlife crisis, but why do you have to ride your ridiculously LOUD penile implant through my quiet neighborhood at 3am?

Here’s an idea; next Saturday night, after you’ve glued on your favorite tattoo and squeezed your pasty-white, flabby-breasted wife into a tube top and leather chaps, do us all a favor and take the Octavia instead.

And more noise for the roommate: if the bedroom’s closed and you can hear moaning and groaning, obviously the people in here are having sex, so back off, go to the bathroom and puke if you have to, but leave it alone! And for those people who smoke and chew gum, etc.,

PLEASE support your own habit. Moochers are extremely annoying! For once I’d like to get through a day without anyone asking me if I have a cigarrete, piece of gum, a condom, a joint, or an extra life! ! !

Another thing I hate; fat Eastern European men with beer bellies working or walking without a shirt. And I hate it when you’re sitting behind someone at a red light, it turns to a green arrow and they just sit there staring at the pretty green arrow! And why do people drive 10 miles under the speed limit when you can’t pass them and when the road becomes 2 lanes one way and you can pass them all of a sudden they can do 15 miles over the speed limit? I guess this is all the power these people have.

Oh, how long a list this could be. First & foremost: MOST PEOPLE ARE STUPID. Let’s begin with people who take up at least 2 parking spaces because of their precious luxury automobiles. This pisses me off daily, especially in my job’s parking lot, which is constantly full. How can these jerks even enjoy their car if they have to worry about something happening to it all the time?

Not to mention, I have to park in East Bunghole & then walk twice as far to the building. I HATE THESE SELFISH BASTARDS! You know what else really sucks? It sucks when you go to another country and you can’t speak the language! It sucks when you’re stuck with housemates who slap you on the back for a morning greeting and then take your cigarettes!

And what’s the deal with ignorant, idiotic, crowd following, black sheep, bandwagon fools? I tell you, there is nothing that gets my goat more than followers. Would they really jump off a bridge if everyone was doi
ng it? YES! Why am I so alone? What is it about me that causes people to avoid me?

Why is that at the end of the day, I am alone. so alone in a heartless, cruel cruel world. Why is it that my heart feels so heavy all the time? Why is it that I uncontrollably cry myself to sleep at least 2 nights per week? What is so wrong with me?

– Ana T.